Updated: Mar 4, 2021
Letting go of guilt.
Letting go of shame.
Letting go of trauma.
Letting go of pride.
Letting go of our perception.
Letting go of who texted who last.
Letting go of fear.
Letting go of worry.
Letting go of heaviness.
Letting go of pettiness.
We can’t always control the toxicity, nor the healthiness of a bond. It’s a beautiful mess, that can easily shift.
In life, we never know what someone else is going through. As hard as it can be, sometimes we have to make the first move, especially if we feel called to do so. Listening to our hearts isn’t always easy.
When we finally muster up the bravery, we must free ourselves mentally from expectations.
Whatever will be, will be.
Earlier this week, I reached out to someone close to me. We see each other once or twice a year, and rarely communicate at all.
I knew this person had personal struggles. I assumed they were dealing with a lot. I knew they were most likely suffering. I knew that even if I tried, I would probably be ignored. So, why bother?
That was my motto for a long time. I was tired of being disappointed and decided to just let go. I stopped reaching out as often, and fully prepared myself for silence. I no longer was a slave to the “what if’s” and the hope for interaction, as much as it hurt my soul. Over the years, I felt like I had tiny holes in my heart, that just couldn’t be filled. Some holes were past and present friendships, coworkers, and even family members. I missed “my people” who I lost touch with. I ached, and deep down knew I couldn’t force someone to respond back. The overall let down was real.
Even the best partner can’t solely be the one to fill every role.
Surprisingly, this person DID reply back that same night. We texted back and forth in long paragraphs, and it was deeply moving for both of us. Incredibly therapeutic, satisfying, and felt like home. I knew I made an impact.
We realized we truly needed one another, in similar ways despite our differences.
Hope is never lost. If over time a relationship isn’t reciprocated, simply let it go. Maybe not forever, but until they are ready. Timing is everything.
In the meantime, we must free our hearts, without taking it personally. Surrounding ourselves with positive, uplifting people.
Relationships are insanely complicated, and each situation is quite different. With that being said, we know what’s best for ourselves. Sometimes it’s absolutely necessary to set healthy boundaries.
However, have faith that sometimes people can change for the better.
We may finally get that text back.
We may receive an apology.
We may open beautiful new doors.
A simple decision to reach out first can impact everyone involved. A therapeutic conversation could alter it all.
We simply never know until we try, or when a broken heart will wake up and fly.
Even if it’s just for one day, one week, one year, or continues for a lifetime. Never underestimate the power within, by having a hopeful heart.